The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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