Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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