What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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