The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
