please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
