Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Randomize
