she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Houston, we have a squirter
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
