I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
