Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
