question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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