remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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