the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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