How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
you never un-have a 4some
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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