I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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