Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
