I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
