Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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