ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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