3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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