It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
