butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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