Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
