It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
