ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
