that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
not ubering you a puppy
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
