She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
