You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
