Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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