if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
