Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
