Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
organizing the empties. That sober.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
