you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
