Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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