I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
