Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Randomize
