he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Sober January is a disaster.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Randomize
