I CAN MOONWALK!
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
