This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
