he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
