Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
