Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize