she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
