found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
