and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
