I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
