He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
