the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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