Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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