Don't you send me to vm
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
