Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
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