I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
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